At my worst

Don't you just feel so sick and frustrated when you're surrounded by people who can't seem to appreciate any of your effort to help these people?

At work, I think it's quite normal to be pressured and unappreciated nowadays, especially if you're working in the Accounts or Finance department. My only colleague and 2 of my senior managers have resigned, leaving me all alone to deal with the management. Not sure when they're going to get the replacement tho. I have been going back at 9-10pm almost everyday. I'm okay with the workload, tho it's getting more but I think I can manage that. But is just the pressure from the top management. I'm just not sure which part of 'i'm handsful' that they don't get but imagine this. It's the last day of month end closing and you have accounts from 6 companies which need to be closed by the end of the day. And suddenly the CFO called you up and asked you to prepare a management report by the same day because she needs it to present to the Board. And no matter how hard you tried to explain to her, she only wants to see the report to be done and given to her by the same day.
Sometimes I wonder why did I take accounting at the first place. Sigh.

At home, came back tired from working the whole day. A family member asked you to send her somewhere and you agreed because she seems not okay and due to sense of responsibility. I don't expect thank you or appreciation but my heart aches when I got scolded on the end.

Almost all the time, I feel that my 'takpelah' attitude is why people always take advantage on me. No one respects me, even my siblings which makes me feel so sad. I'm trying to fulfill their needs, trying to be the best sister they could ever ask for but yet, I'm the one ended with a broken heart almost everyday.

Right at this point, I'm not quite sure how I should feel. I just want to get out from this place and start a new life somewhere else, where people don't know me so I can start to refrain myself from being so attached with anyone.


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